Sunday, December 7, 2008

Input Please!

I have a request for all of my married lady readers...

As you all know, I've been actively researching photographers, videographers, florists, bakers etc! Although it's super fun, I'm still trying to determine what I actually need, and what I should focus on.

If you've been married, please answer these few questions....

1. What did you do that you could have lived without?

2. What would you do differently if you could relive the day?

3. What would refuse to compromise on?

4. Any other planning/wedding advice?

Thanks in advance!


~Mrs. Guru~ said...

Hmm, I didn't have a video person. Several of our friends did and once they got the video only watched it once. So I figured I could live without and I did. I will always remember my wedding. I refused to skimp on the flowers and the cake. However, my cake lady was pretty reasonable. I paid the most for the DJ and the place. We didn't serve dinner and it was by far the best thing we did. We saved thousands of dollars by doing a dessert reception only. We got so many compliments on it! However, we also had a later wedding. Good luck on your choices and you kinda just have to go with your gut feeling. If others don't like it then oh well. It is your wedding!

Jennifer said...

Definitely spend money on the photographer and the videographer. We spent a lot on our photographer but had my Uncle video our wedding and the quality is horrible...that is really the only thing I regret. Oh...and make sure your photographer is the type to take some candid shots...not everything posed. Some of my favorite pictures are the ones where we didn't know they were taking them. Definitely do what you and your fiance want and don't let your parents or the wedding coordinator/etc tell you what you want. For instance...Ken and I didn't cut our cake and feed it to each other...I know..everyone does that but I didn't want cake all over my dress and kind of find that tradition we didn't do it. That is just one example. Remember it is your day:)

Mrs. S. said...

My husband and I went all by ourselves to Jamaica and got married. It was amazing!

1. We did everything we really wanted to do and didn't go overboard. There is nothing that I can say we could not have lived without that day.

2. I would have made sure we brought "our song" with us...I forgot the CD, but we couldn't hear the music anyway with the waves crashing beside us! :)

3. Location...that made it the most special day ever.

4. Do what you are the one that will remember it forever. Our parents were not super happy that we went away and got married at first. We are both only children, and this was hard for his mom especially. We knew that this was what we WANTED. We are the ones that look back on those memories every year, not them. You have to plan your wedding for you. Don't sweat the small stuff because in the grand scheme of things, you remember each other on that, not whether the caterer is late, or the music isn't loud enough, or everything isn't perfect. I just have to say that no matter who sheds tears that day, none of them should be yours because of planning. The tears should be of pure joy, not unhappiness.

I hope this helps!

Solar Powered said...

back to your blog for the first time in a long time. Congratulations!
1. Nothing really, if it started to stress me I called a friend, she told me what to do and i moved on. In 5 years, you won't be thinking about colors and cakes and'll be thinking about the fun people moments and the moments b/w you and your husband
2. Start getting ready a little earlier so I could have sat in my dress with my mom and girls and had a glass of champagne...I was rushed. Also, I would have had a videographer for the entire day rather than just the wedding
3. Photographer, pictures. I still get my wedding books out and look at them.
4. Have fun and enjoy every moment. When it was over I was a little sad and like "What do I get to plan next?" Oh, and try to write thank you cards right when you get the gift...those things stressed me out for months afterwards.

Solar Powered said...

oh, and I also went away to get married but took close family and friends. It was a perfect day.

Susan said...

I think the two things that we did that made our wedding go especially well (aside from the obvious photography, flowers, food, venue etc.) was a "Day Of" Wedding Planner and professional babysitters at the wedding.

The "Day Of" planner was perfect for me. I'm something of a control freak and wanted the be hands on in my planning. My coordinator took care of things that day like - picking up my dress and getting it to the site, dealing with my step-daughter's meltdown when she couldn't find her shoes, keeping the photographer, musicians, venue staff, etc. on schedule... and countless other behind the scenes things. I knew she was worth the money we spent when I told her, after looking at the reception room, that one of the talbes was on the wrong side of the room. She said she would take care of it and I later heard her telling the venue staff that the table had to be moved. They argued, but she stood firm. And the table got moved. This is something I would have done normally, but it was WONDERFUL to have someone to take care of those details so I could really enjoy the day.

Professional babysitters made it so the kids could enjoy the event, the parents could enjoy the event - and when the kids got tired of being there, we had rented a separate room with TV, DVDs, toys, treats, etc. for them.

All in all, money well spent.

Good luck with your planning!

A.D. said...

Sorry it has taken me so long to answer. I've been slammed at work and home.
I would def. not skimp on the photographer/videographer. Every year on our anniversary we watch our wedding video and I LOVE it. Also, the idea about the candid shots is great. I had some friends take these, but I wish I had the real photographer take some as well. We didn't spend a lot of money on flowers because our reception place didn't need them. We just bought the bouquets and a few table arrangements and we saved a ton of money. We also just had appetizers at the reception so that we could have a full open bar...priorities, ya know!
The only thing we did that I might have changed was that we went to a dance instructor and had a special dance choreographed to our song. It was fun, but it really stressed us out because we were afraid we were going to mess up!
Good luck with the planning and with the horribly Wednesday stuff!!! I'll be sending positive thoughts!

Jackie said...

Definitely spend your money on a great photographer. The day will be a blur and you will want awesome pictures to help you remember every little moment.

Also, we payed a little more for a band and it was the best decision ever. We got so many great comments about how it was the best wedding reception ever. You will remember the actual wedding and the party, so you want to make sure it is tons of fun! You could also get a great DJ, just make sure they know how to keep people out on the dance floor and everyone happy!

I also think it is important to start getting ready as early as possible. I had a 5 o'clock wedding, started getting my hair done at 9, make-up at noon, then had a chance to sit and have lunch (and a couple drinks) with my girls. This was all awesome and I totally recommend it, but because I took so long to get ready and jus relax, I was kind of rushed in getting dressed and relaxing/taking pictures in my dress. This was partly my church's fault, they made me get dressed there and didn't allow us in the church until an hour and fifteen minutes before the ceremony....but still, take time to be in your dress and enjoy being a bride before all the fuss begins! Hope that helps :)

Me in Memphis said...

We eloped, and that's the best advice I can give anyone :D