Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Evolution of a Belly and Other Thoughts

I have so much to say. I have so many things to write about. But 99% of the time I forget that I even have a blog.

I have had one of the easiest pregnancies (knock on wood), but making a child sure knocks out all motivation to do anything else.

I can't even blame being busy. Work in the summer is the opposite of busy, but when I get home, hooking my iphone up to my computer to upload pictures seems like an overwhelming task. I'm going to try to get better.. because I want to. Hopefully now that school is starting up again, falling into a routine will help my get up and go get back.

For now, I will leave you with these gems of wisdom about being pregnant:

1. You will get bigger. You make think that you are bigger than a house, but sob-- you will get bigger. My belly may need it's own zip code by month 9.

2. You will pee a lot. But it won't be nice satisfying pees. You will squeeze out like an ounce and have to go back for more five minutes later.

3. You will drop everything and lose everything and forget everything.

4. You will become emo. Now, thankfully I'm not one of those pregnant crazies that cries every day.. but I cry like every week now.

All of my crying is irrational.

For example- last night I dropped shit from the toaster oven, dropped chicken that I was cutting up, and then dropped dinner down the front of my shirt. I cried.

Another example- when you become pregnant-- all country music will make you cry. The following lines are like emotional suicide for me....

a) it's a new tshirt saying I'm a grandpa.
(ummm, I'm not even going to be a grandpa so WTF)

b) just to see you smile
(isn't that a break up song?.. I'm very happy with my husband)

c) any line from Carrie Underwood's "All American Girl" song
(doh. I'm not even having a girl).

My advice-- carry tissues in the car.

5. People are not nicer to pregnant people. Perhaps they are in other countries that are not populated full of self centered assholes-- But here in the US of A.. grandma will still cut you off with her shopping cart and get in line in front of you and little kids will still try to boogey board right by you and knock you over.

Now some perks--

1. No one can side eye you for eating everything and ANYTHING under the sun. I love cookies!!

2. The clothes. Maternity clothes are the B-O-M-B. They are comfy and nowadays they are cute. Getting pregnant is an excuse to go shopping. HOLLER.

3. You can be dumb, forget things, drop things, and cry and your family can't disown you!!

4. Redecorating!!

5. Buying tiny little shoes and clothing.

6. Catching the glance of your main man and thinking, "wow, we made this!"


jv726 said...

Ha! I love your lists. As far as irrational crying (at least for me) it doesn't stop after you have the baby! I cried this morning b/c my husband left out the thawed breast milk over night so we had to throw away 9 oz of milk. I was pissed and crying and told him I was just going to quit pumping at work. Irrational? Maybe. Justified? I think so! Pumping sucks and you better not waste my milk! :)
I love reading about your pregnancy! I hope it continues to go well!

Anonymous said...

Amen. lol

Ashley said...

I love your 6 weeks outfit! That is so cute! AS are the rest of your outfits. Such good style. I wish I looked that put together everyday. So glad you've had such an easy pregnancy. That's a blessing for sure. And some country songs make me cry even though I'm not pregnant. Hope you're get up and go comes back. If not.. just keep taking it easy. You have an excuse!

Ashley said...

I agree with all of the above! It is going to be crazy to have to zip a pair of pants again!

Anonymous said...

I'm not even going to be a grandpa. OMG, this made me snort. Great post!

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